THE LEGACY OF "ENGOT"

By: Capt. Alvils

In life we all have an unspeakable secret, an irreversible regret, an unreachable dream and an unforgettable love. ~ Diego Marchi

This is the story of my elder brother, Emilio Jr., who went though extreme pain and difficulties in life. He valued friendship and his friends so much that he is often conned and taken advantage of by them. He never wish for wealth or fame but just a simple and happy living. But his countless mistakes, wrong decisions and indecisions made his life miserable and complicated. He dreamt of a perfect family but instead found it broken and divided. He hungered for love from his children but was instead scorned and despised by them.

We all call him “Jun”, but he is humorously known by his close friends and associates as “Engot” because of his poor hearing and low intellectual capability. Yet, he surprises everyone, especially those who ridiculed and made fun of him, by excelling in most area of human competition, except, perhaps, the field of academics.

He was the eldest boy among a brood of 9 and my father, a ship captain, immediately christened him as his “junior”. As a mischievous youngster, his favorite toy was a clothes iron which he hangs from the ceiling and swings it like a pendulum. One day, he got hit by the sharp, pointed edge of the iron. It pierced and penetrated his temple and had to be rushed to the hospital for treatment.

“Perhaps, this explains why he is so intellectually poor”, joked my mother.

Indeed, he is so dull in class that it took him 7 years to finish his 6-years elementary schooling. It could have been 8 years had my mother not pleaded the school principal for sympathy because the family is relocating to Manila.

Yet, there was something unusual about him. Dim-witted as he may be, he seems to excel on almost anything that his hands could lay on. In his adolescent years, he became curios with the piano instrument. He watched intensely as his two sisters took turns in taking piano lessons from a tutor. When no one is around, he would open the piano cover board and start fiddling with the keys; this arouses the ire of the two sisters who are afraid he might break the instrument. But before anyone knew it, he was already playing the piano better than the two girls. Finally, without formal lesson or learning the musical chords, he could already play any tune by just listening to the music.

I was about 9 or 10 years old when he first treated me to a snack at “Chick and Egg”, a small restaurant located along the Bonifacio Monument circle (the site is now crowded with shopping malls). There he saw an unoccupied piano and asked the owner if he could play with the instrument. The owner agreed and as he began tickling the keyboard, playing to the rhythm of fast boogie and cha-cha music, curious onlookers started gathering at the door entrance obviously enjoying the live performance. By the time he finished his short concert, the whole restaurant was occupied with guests.

The owner approached our table and asked: “Can you come to this place every night? I’ll give you free drinks and meals”

“Can I bring my small brother along?” Jun asked.

“Of course”, said the owner.

From then on, after school, he would take me to this eatery for free snacks. He amused the crowd with his musical prowess while I ingest my sandwich, ice cream soda and fruit juices.

I never did bother to find out how good he was with the piano. But one piano enthusiast watching him play his repertoire on both modern classical and jazz music said he was very entertaining.

Business was never that good for “Chick and Egg” restaurant after that.

In his early years, Jun also developed a keen interest in playing basketball. He became so good with the sport that Manila Central University (MCU) of Caloocan City took him in as scholar despite his poor elementary school standing. He played together with Zaldy schornack, an excellent ball handler, who eventually became a movie star.

I was 13 years old, a high school freshman, when he first took me to Rizal Memorial stadium to watch their game against National University (NU) bulldogs. He played shrewd and superb basketball. He dribbled the ball so fast and was very accurate with his textbook “jump shots” that the opponent (NU quintet) runs in frantic every time he holds the ball. That time there was still no ruling against “illegal screening” (illegal pick). Sensing that Jun was lucky with his shots that day, the MCU coach gave instructions to center the play on him. The remaining 4 members of his squad took turns in giving him the “screen”. He scored 45 points to convincingly beat the NU team. While MCU never won any UAAP championship, that game was their finest hour in basketball.

Perhaps, his greatest achievement in life was when he won the university’s declamation contest. Despite having poor grades, his teachers and professors chose him to represent the graduating class because of his ability to act and memorize verses of poem.

I could never forget his oratorical piece: William Shakespeare’s - “The Defense of Brutus”. Day and night he practice with the speech, always shrieking and shouting on top of his voice, sometimes fluctuating into falsetto, every time he reached the part: “As he was valiant, I honor him, but, as he was ambitious, I slew him”…

Everyone in the house was complaining about the noise. Mother has to repeatedly remind him to lower down his voice so others may sleep. I, myself, was not bothered by his racket. But I really find his speech very awkward and was pretty sure people would find it unworthy of listening.

On the day of the contest, I and my classmates were seated at the front row of the auditorium. It was the assigned seats for freshman and sophomore students. I saw brother Jun arguing with his mentors. Later, I would learned that he forget to bring his costume. It was the white robe, long toga and the wreath of laurel leaves crown that I saw laying on the sofa prior to my leaving the house. They prohibited him from returning home lest his number might soon come up.

“Now he really doesn’t stand a chance. He will only embarrass me”, I said to myself.

Most of the participants were fantastic with their performances and medieval age costumes. In the play “Romeo and Juliet”, Juliet appeared from a make-shift balcony and started searching for Romeo. She wore a loose white gown, with cap of criss-crossed pearls, long, wide sleeves with low girdle about the hips and wreaths of flowers crowning her flowing hair. She was simply gorgeous and beautiful with her outfit.

“Oh Romeo, my Romeo, where art thou Oh Romeo”, Juliet uttered with a soft, angelic voice.

The audience applauded Romeo, who looks like a real prince, as he appeared from nowhere. He was wearing a long-sleeves white shirt with puffy decorations on the shoulder, cap with long feathers trailing over his shoulder, matched with blue tights, velvet pointed shoes and a small saber tucked under his belt. The duo received a standing ovation from the crowd right after their performance.

Next was a guy mimicking the handsome and macho Marc Antony. He was wearing a long tunic in two shades of brown with gold printing, wine colored cape, brown leather belt and shining body armor, partly showing his muscular chest.

“Friends, Romans and countrymen. Lend me your ears...” People cheered as he begins his opening oratorical speech on the supposedly funeral of Julius Caesar.

Then, it was time for my brother Jun to climb the platform. There was an eerie silence as he steps on the concrete stairs. He was in civilian clothes. As he walks towards the center of the stage, I thought I heard somebody “booed” from the audience. As he begin his opening oration- “Romans, countrymen and lovers. Hear me for my cause and be silent…” I closed my eyes and covered my ears, not wanting to hear from him any further. The guy sitting beside me was puzzled by my reaction.

It must have been an eternity of time before he finally ended his declamation speech. I heard clapping of hands but not as loud as for the other contestants. I felt uneasy waiting for the result of the contest. As the emcee announce the consolation, third and second place (unusually, the pair of Romeo and Juliet, whom I thought would take home the trophy, won second price), I stand up, grab the arms of my classmates, and we all started making our way towards the auditorium exit. Half-way to the gate, as the first place was announced; I noticed my classmates and some of my teachers jumping with joy. They congratulated me; others embraced me, some pat my shoulder and shook my hands. They were cheering in unison, “Your brother won! Your brother won! The Alviolas are really great”. I turned my head around and in disbelief saw brother Jun receiving the gold medal and the first prize trophy.

Today, every time I recall that event, I am still bothered by guilt knowing that none of us morally supported him in his quest for supremacy in that prestigious competition. While other people believe in him and what he can achieve, his own family did not.

After graduating from High school, he took up nautical course at the prodding of my father. After failing most of his navigation subjects, father opined that schooling is not for him and decided instead to send him onboard the ship as engine mechanic. In those days, you need not be a marine engineering graduate to be an engineer. He became a 4^th engineer after serving several years as mechanic. Indeed, it was again his ability to excel on anything his hands could lay on that prevailed.

But, as successful as he was in most of his undertakings, Jun was never lucky in the affairs of his heart. It was during the period when he seems to be climbing the ladder of success that he met “Adoring”, a lovely, respectable woman who live next door to our house. He fell in love with her and after several months of courtship a romance between the two blossomed. But their relationship was short-lived. Jun was despised by Adoring’s father. The old-fashioned old man disapproved of their relationship. He hated the idea that his daughter may soon be marrying a seaman, a profession that was then notorious for having “a girl in every port”. Obedience to her parents, Adoring ended their relationship.

Jun was broken-hearted. But being still young and aggressive, he was able to overcome the grief and concentrated instead in building his career as marine engineer. He applied for job abroad and was readily hired by “Egon Oldendorf”, a shipping company based in Hamburg, West Germany. There he worked for several years learning the trick of the trade including the German language. On his return to the country he met “Susan”, a gorgeous, liberated woman who was also one of our boarders. She was at that time studying in Manila. Jun fell in love for the second time. After a brief period of courtship, Susan accepted his love proposal. Plans for a wedding were soon underway. But as Jun and our family was about to ask Susan’s parents for her hand in marriage, something went wrong. The wedding was called off. This time Jun was not only broken-hearted but also depressed and devastated. His whole life’s purpose flashed before his eyes in that one solitary moment. He attempted to end his own life by cutting his wrist. I woke up one morning and saw him laying in a pool of blood. He was immediately rushed to hospital. He would not have survived had Susan not visited him at the hospital and decided to proceed with the wedding.

The first few years of married life was perhaps Jun’s happiest moments. Susan gave birth to a daughter and a son. They were Christened Clarizze and Alvin. Several years later, Jun decided to relocate his family to Hamburg, West Germany. A decision that he will soon regret for the rest of his life.

In Hamburg, Susan met Arnim Joop, a West German national. The two became very close to each other. Some said they were having an affair. Jun was not only jealous but also felt betrayed. Despite Susan’s explanation that she and Arnim were just friends, Jun was unconvinced. A heated quarrel ensued resulting to Jun leaving Hamburg and abandoning his family. For Susan and the two kids, it was the hardest times of their lives ever. With nobody to support them and nobody to legitimate their stay in Germany, they live with the help of other people while waiting for the immigration officer to knock on their door and announce their deportation.

Arnim came to the rescue. He moved in with the family, supported them and eventually married Susan to prevent their expatriation. When Susan was asked by closed friends why she wedded Arnim when he was the root cause of her marital problems and the reason why her husband left Germany, She said: “Well, since it was Arnim who aided us in time of distress, and since my husband suspected me of having an affair with him, I might as well do it for real”. Indeed, it was just like correcting a mistake by making another mistake.

In retrospect, Jun was wrong in leaving his family. But it wasn’t entirely his fault.

Jun returned to the country and stop sailing for good. He joined the academe and taught engineering subjects. It was this time that he met “Brenda”, a separated lady who was then in-charge with the school’s canteen. Jun fell in love for the 3^rd time. He married Brenda and had a son which he named- “Hendie Philip Alviola”.

One day, while Jun was conducting classes, he collapsed and fell unconscious. The attending physician thought he was just exhausted. But further clinical tests showed that he’s suffering from a bone marrow disease. A type of cancer that has started to destroy the flexible tissues of his hip bone and vertebrae. It was causing his posture to bend down like an old man and body to shrink in height and in size. While he could still walk with the aid of steel braces, which he wore like a pant’s suspender, he was already in and out of the hospital. Soon, the dwindling funds could no longer sustain his regular therapy and medicines. Out of work, the financial support coming from his brothers and sisters were just not enough. As the cancer cell progresses, his body slowly deteriorated. During my last visit to the hospital, aware of the rising medical costs, Jun asked Brenda to take him to her hometown province in Dumaguete. He also requested me to look for Clarizze and Alvin. For me it was a premonition that I might not be able to see him again.

Through the internet, I searched desperately for his children but could not locate them. A month later, I received a phone call from Brenda. I have to come to Dumaguete, Jun is dying. He is already hallucinating, calling the names of his two children Clarizze and Alvin.

As I discussed plans with my brothers and sisters to travel to Dumaguete, there was another phone call from Brenda. Jun passed away.

I flew to Dumaguete city the next day. I travelled alone. Instead of spending money for airfare, my brothers and sisters opted to just donate their funds for the wake and burial. In Dumaguete city airport I was met by a local resident whom my younger brother, Arturo, requested to accompany me to the remote municipality of Siaton, Dumaguete, the town where Brenda resides. It was coming to dusk when we finally located the place. There I met Brenda, her old mother and the two kids (My nephew, Hendie, and another girl from her first relationship).The house was an old, nipa hut elevated from four corners by trunks of trees. The kind of weak structure that is leaning to one side and maybe just waiting for the next strong wind to collapse. Jun’s remains were place at a small area underneath the house, so narrow that there was barely enough room for a coffin. It was the last night of vigil. At about 07:00 pm, some neighbors started to appear. I wasn’t sure if they came for the wake or just curious to see me. Since there weren’t enough space inside the house, everyone sat outside. A group of evangelist (Jun was converted to Evangelism upon his return to the country) held a prayer services. A couple of hours later the place was deserted. Brenda went up to sleep with the kids while I was left alone sitting beside Jun’s coffin. Unfortunately, just after midnight, a power interruption occurred and the lights went out. I lighted several candles and place it on top of the coffin. Although terrified with the thought of seeing Jun’s spirit, I was determined to keep watch until morning. The following day, Jun was finally laid to rest in a simple catholic ceremony.

A month after Jun's internment, I finally located Clarizze’s e-mail address from her school’s website. When I sent a message telling her that her father passed away and that he was asking for her and Alvin before he died, she responded: “May he rest in peace”.

Clarizze went on to say: "You should not have tried to locate me because I don't want to be located".

I’ve known my niece, Clarizze, during her school days. Besides being attractive, she was also an intelligent, responsible and determine woman. She used to come and visit me at my office. While she never asks me for any favor, I try to give her some money for spending and assist her in any way I can. In fact, I have always felt that I was closer to her than her father or anyone else in our family. Among our family, I was the only one present at the airport when she departed for Canada. That was the last time I saw her.

I feel sad and disappointed that after all these years Clarizze has not forgiven her repentant father. In that single moment of his father’s mistake, she condemned him forever. Clarizze may have forgotten that she is compelled by her creator to accept whatever kind of father she has. God never gave us the freedom of choice to select who our parents should be. But one thing is certain, without a father she wouldn’t be born in this world to enjoy her children, her children’s children and the luxuries of living.

"Honor they father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD they God giveth thee." Exodus 20:12. The bible never said if your father is dumb, stupid and irresponsible; you may honor only your mother, not your father.

Despite his many talents, humility and generosity that every one of us admired, Jun was born mentally, emotionality and intellectually weak to confront the cruelty and complexities of life. Looking back at his many sufferings, failures, setbacks and disappointments, he must have found death more gratifying than life.

ERRATUM

Comments and reactions from readers, particularly those who have first-hand information about the incident, compelled me to rewrite some paragraphs of this blog. For those who said my article was partly incorrect, I stand to be corrected.

Here’s my revision of that painful event:

In Hamburg, West Germany, Susan met Arnim Joop, a German national and newspaper man who published articles about the escapades of Filipino “beach comers” (directly hired Filipino seafarers).They became very close to each other. There were rumors that the two were having an affair. Jun confronted Susan on why she is frequenting Arnim’s place. The latter explained that she is working part time for Arnim doing mostly house hold chores. But the former was unconvinced. Out of suspicion, Jun went on a short leave from his job as an engineer onboard a German flag ship and arrived home unannounced. Susan was not in the house. Jun went straight to Armin’s place and from a distance saw Susan in the apartment window wearing a negligee. Jun was not only jealous but also infuriated. When Susan answered the knock on the door, Jun dragged her out in the street. A violent quarrel ensued. Thereafter, Jun ordered Susan to get her belongings and vacate the house. He also requested the immigration bureau to deport Susan and the kids. Susan took the two kids, left the house and hid in a monastery to avoid deportation. For days they played hide and seek with immigration people, transferring from one place to another, seeking refuge from houses of friends and religious organization. Finally, the immigration officer caught up with them, hand-cuffed Susan and the two kids and brought them to the airport. In her memoirs, Susan described this event as the hardest times of their lives.

In Manila, the two kids continue with their schooling while Susan waited developments from Hamburg. Sometime later, Arnim arranged for Susan to come to Hamburg. There they got married and moved to Canada. Years later, Susan petitioned the two kids to Canada where they now live up to present time.

When Susan was asked by closed friends why she married Arnim when she has always maintain that they were just friends, besides the fact that her relationship with the latter was the primary cause of her marital problems, she said: “Arnim aided us in times of needs and since Jun suspected me of having an affair with him, I might as well substantiate his suspicion and do it for real”. Indeed, it was just like correcting a mistake by making another mistake.

Jun erred in his decision to include in the deportation order his children, Clarizze and Alvin. What he should have done was to get rid of Susan but kept the two kids with him in Hamburg. Then again, it is also doubtful if the two kids would agree on separating with their mother. But at least it would leave an impression to them that they were not totally abandoned by their father.

In retrospect, Jun made some poor judgments in handling his own family's affair. But it was not entirely his fault.

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